Missed Connections Street Version

I’ve spent countless hours browsing the Missed Connections section of Craigslist (it’s not just for finding someone to do inappropriate things with ya know). You never know when you might have really struck a chord with someone. Aside from that, it helps me feel better about the way I’ve been going about not dating. I have to give it to these people. They want something badly enough to get right out there on the Internet and look for it. Yeah, it’s sort of desperate, but when you KNOW… you just KNOW. That missed connection was “the one”.

Some are full on honest:

I was the creepy dude… ahem, sorry… “dewd”

Some are downright rude:

This is sure to win her heart..

It’s still not the most desperate thing they could do. No, the most desperate thing to do would be to be like Joe. Joe is looking for Kelly A. Joe’s no fool though. He knows when you really want to find someone you take it to the streets. Craigslist is too hit and miss when it comes to love. He ran into Kelly at the Kew Gardens train station and he’s been looking for her since.  He’s so desperate to find Kelly that he’s hand writing signs and posting them around town. Screw the Internet! He’s got paper, bitches.

He’s done the leg work. He’s been to her apartment, which is vacant. Maybe it’s just me, but I don’t think he’s been looking for her from the day he saw her at the train station. If he has been, Kelly A gave him a fake address. What the heck did she do with him at the station? Were they just talking? Did he ask her to kill someone for him and then changed his mind? Did they hook up and later that day he found out he’s itchy and it burns to pee? Did she drop her wallet? Is that where he got her address? Driver’s licenses are notorious for having old addresses on them. Kelly has probably moved 10 times since then.

Regardless, Joe needs to talk to her. If you guys know anyone in NYC named Kelly with the last initial A who used to live on Greenfell, help a guy out. Tell her to meet him at the Kew Garden station at midnight. Wear red. Carry mace. I think he might have her wallet or a disease. His sign said, “this is my last shot”, but Joe…buddy,  I’m here for ya. THIS is your last shot.

Image Source

Image Source

*This link is good if you live in my hood and maybe smiled at a guy while you were getting the window on your Regal fixed… or were waiting at a stop light in your friend’s Regal and talked to a dude while you waited.