Potential Prostitutes

Considering how shamefully women are still treated around the world despite all the milestones women are making, nothing should shock me anymore. But Les Grands Internets continually prove me wrong.

Are you worried there’s a prostitute in your neighborhood? Afraid that sexy Mrs. Robinson will steal your sons’ virtue? Or just want to shame that slut in the tight pants next door who gets laid more than you do? Well have no fear, ladies and gentlemen, because “Potential Prostitutes” is the answer to your bigoted prayers and that stick up your ass.

At Potential Prostitutes, you can submit the name, location, and even the phone number of a hooker near you and shame her publicly. And it doesn’t matter if she is or isn’t an actual sex trade worker, because we don’t care! All we want is her money. Wonder how it works? If she wants her profile taken down, she has to poney up the dough. But at the low, low price of just $99.95 (That’s only ten easy payments of $9.99!), it’s a pittance for any prostitute, whether she’s Pretty Woman or one of Jack the Ripper’s victims. Plus, let’s be honest. She deserves it, the whore.

Yes, this site really exists. No, that’s not copy from the site. But it’s not far off.

Potential Prostitutes ’operate[s] based on the efforts from motivated members of their local community who have at one point or another come into contact with a potential prostitute online and feel they can be a threat.’ The mission statement goes on to thank ‘brave visitors for stepping forward to tell the world what it should already know, that exposing online prostitute discourages other potential offenders from doing the very same thing.’

Setting aside the Scarlet Letter-esque implications of such vigilantism, there’s nothing here proving these women are actually prostitutes and the FAQ page makes it clear they don’t care if the women are prostitutes or not. This isn’t a governmental sex offender site, this is an anonymously operated site where anyone can anonymously submit anyone’s name. Angry at that girl who cheated on you? Potential prostitute. Upset that barista won’t ever go out with you? Potential prostitute. Bitter your girlfriend won’t sleep with you, even after 5 dates? Potential prostitute. Jealous at that one bitch who gets all the guys when you don’t? Potential prostitute. Really, I could keep this list going all day.

Doesn’t matter who we hurt and humiliate and whose lives we ruin, as long as we keep on shaming women for having sex or not having sex, for having too much sex or not enough sex. Either way, a public flogging is always in order. We can’t let these uppity smart feminazis get any ideas now. Gotta put those bitties back in their places.

Barf.

It seems the only crimes Potential Prostitutes are truly successful at exposing isn’t prostitution; it’s extortion and libel. Someone call Gloria Allred.

Next time: why we should legalize prostitution.

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