Maya Fischer, age 9, believes Canada’s Girl Guide motto, which she can recite from memory: I promise to do my best, to be true to myself, my beliefs and Canada; I will take…
The day after Rush Limbaugh declares diet and exercise a devilish tool of the left-wing conspriracy, Wal-Mart announces they’ll stock Twinkies on their shelves. GO.
Last year, when pastry and chemical maker Hostess went out of business there was a public uproar over the potential loss of Twinkies from store shelves. People apparently started buying them up and…
Mmmmm… Healthy, wholesome breast milk. Straight off the tap. It’s good to be rich.
Marijuana causes people to be lazy, apathetic, and lethargic. Watching Weeds on Netflix causes people to believe they have a clue what they’re talking about when it comes to drug dealing. Smoking the wrong strain will turn you into a bleach blonde bimbo with a lazy eye and an uncontrollable urge to take selfies.
Sure, Florida is one of the most tropical states on the mainland, but aside from it’s notorious reputation for being home to thousands of gold diggers it also has some of the country’s largest bugs. Let’s add the Gallinipper to that list. If you thought your little Iowa mosquito bite was irritating, take a look at this giant blood sucker that’s 20x the size of your little pest.
Don’t blame me for this! This is science.
Kids these days. It seems like they are immune to the good old-fashioned guilt trips we succumbed to when we were young. What’s a parent to do when their child won’t eat their meatloaf? You hire… ahem… I mean ask some REALLY skinny person to act as a starving person. Nothing terrifies a child like a skinny person, right?
While I think we can all agree Jolie’s admission was courageous and timely, the question remains—is a prophylactic double mastectomy the best option?
Some would say coffee’s caffeinated powers were enough to sell them on the habit, but now we know coffee can also prevent strokes and liver failure! Take that, you coffee-free freaks!